“When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things”

So says Corinthians.  When I was a child, I imagined that I’d grow up to be superhero, a starship captain, an intrepid archaeologist, a great detective, a titan of industry, a genius – someone awesome.

Then I went to school, got a job, got a real life, and real life got me.  I became a husband, then a father.  I put away some of my childish things – I didn’t have to be a superhero, or even a hero.  Just a good guy would do.  No need to be a starship captain.  I’m busy steering the family through the tumults of life as it is.  Intrepid explorer, detective, tycoon?  Well, let me get through my day job first.

Some of this is prudent.  But it feels…wrong somehow.  I used to dream and think about how to do great things, used to dream of what I would do to change the world, used to dream about becoming…awesome.  And it would quicken my pulse, put some extra oomph in my steps, and a sparkle in my eye.  Putting away my childish things have made me loose some of this, and it feels wrong.

I didn’t know how wrong it was until my son was born.  Until he started to walk and talk and point to things and ask me questions and tell me of his imaginary friends and pretend games and made me wonder “what am I going to teach this child?”  How am I going to guide him through the world so that he doesn’t lose his sense of wonder and his 50 million dreams?

And it hit me.  I can’t tell him what to do.  He’s gonna have to figure things out himself.  And given he’s got both mine and my wife’s DNA, he’s not gonna just do what we tell him anyway.  So the best way would be to show him.  I will show him how to live life to the fullest.  I will show him how to dream big things, do great work, and be a good person.  I will show him how to be…awesome.  But that means I gotta figure out how to be awesome myself.

So screw Corinthians.  I choose to pick up my childish things again, because childish things are awesome.  I choose to rekindle my dreams and and my hopes and my aspirations and try to figure out how to get shit done.  I choose to be awesome, and I will write down everything I read, everything I learn, everything I hear and see that can take a person one step closer to awesomeness.  I’m no longer a child so I don’t know if I’ll ever achieve awesomeness, but that’s not the point.  I’m gonna follow the trails left behind by the good, great, and awesome people before me, and maybe make a few of my own.  As they say, it’s not the destination, it’s the journey, right?  Moreover, I’m gonna show my son my person path to awesomeness so that he can learn from it and figure out his own.

Alright, let’s see where this path goes.

— Kieun